This post comes to you in 9 parts. I’m attempting vivisection on the tragic disappointment of a 21st century woman in a messed up world.
Allow me to introduce our cast:
In blue is OP. She lives a generally rough-around-the-edges lifestyle and has had quite a few suitors. She also is covered in ugly tats. She swears like a sailor and drinks like…well…a sailor again. She’s pudgy and has been attempting to lose the weight she gained from kicking drugs.
In green is the affirmation robot. She’s the more attractive friend and her facebook is full of narcissistic model-shots of her in her underwear or similarly revealing items along with kittens. Go figure.
And last to the party is pink. I’d like to think his words speak for himself.
And now, they play for your amusement. We set the stage on the fair city of facebook.
1. It seems to me if you want the results your grandmother had, you’d best employ her practices. I doubt your grandmother had a tattoo much less the several that cover large portions of you. Also I doubt your grandmother allowed quite so many people into her bed. Also, the choice language you use most likely weren’t in her vocabulary and the instinct to blame everything on men was probably not her first reaction.
2. Translation- “I’m so relieved that I’m not the only person whose unrealistic standards and expectations are failing me.”
3. Again, why are you hoping for similar results when your methods differ so greatly?
4. Alpha f*cks, beta bucks. You obviously have been enjoying the carousel ride, however you’re not going to get a stallion to live in your stable with the qualities you have. The guys you’ve been bedding who don’t call you back are doing so because you’re a dime a dozen, honey. You’re overselling yourself if you believe otherwise.
5. Really? My grandma would have been ok in a convent for a few months. My bet is yours would have been too. Not much is required of a woman: Submission, modesty, manners and self-control. Ok, I take that back. That’s a lot to today’s women.
6. First rational thought. Imagine what would happen if you improved and exhibited the old-fashioned qualities your grandparents valued? You might get the old-fashioned results.
7. Again, darling, you’ve been bedding the wrong cowboys. There’s a host of fellas who’d love to hang their guns on your wall and leave their boots at the foot of your bed for the rest of their lives with you. The problem is you think you’re way out of their league. Ditch your standards. You can either have alpha f*cks or beta bucks. You’re never gonna wrangle them both out of the same ranch hand. Kate Upton you are not, despite your comparable level of underwear pics online.
8. Ever think this is what’s holding you down? My advice to girls today: be a nun without the habit (robes). Learn to exercise modesty, have manners, exhibit self-control (especially in staying in shape) and learn to submit and not make yourself the center of everything. Or you can keep trying the same thing and hoping for the eventual Prince Charming that Disney promised you when you were a little girl.
9. You’re also never getting laid. If you’re still trying to defend yourself as a nice guy in this day and age, you’re blind in beta baloney. Your effeminate qualities are about as off-putting as these ladies’ male qualities. Don’t be nice. Be fair. That’s what people look for in a leader. You want to have a girl on your arm? Lead.
The entire discussion gives me a headache. Blue obviously knows her grandmother has something good going on, but is unwilling to probe why. It’s like me saying I want to be exactly like my grandpa except I don’t want to work hard, look out for my family, and be an all-around badass who can lead the family.
Blue is not a genuinely bad person. I once talked with her at a party for a half hour. She wants what is good, but has no idea how to get it. For that I blame the society in which we live. She’s got good instincts. Look towards grandma and grandpa to see what works. The only problem is she wants the results without the work. Moments like post 6 are unfortunately rare glimmers in this dark hole we’ve fallen into as a society.